news nugget

It smells like irony in here.

Greenpeace fined for reef damage.

Environmental group Greenpeace has been fined almost $7,000 (£4,000) for damaging a coral reef at a World Heritage site in the Philippines.


Talks are underway to determine the feasibility of changing the name of the organization to Greenpeace the Destroyer.

Their flagship Rainbow Warrior II ran aground at Tubbataha Reef Marine Park, in the Sulu Sea, 650km (400 miles) south-east of Manila.
Park officials said almost 100 sq m (1,076 sq ft) of reef had been damaged.


That’s a lot of reef, Greenpeace.

Greenpeace agreed to pay the fine, but blamed the accident on outdated maps provided by the Philippines government.

That’s convenient. It seems like you’re blaming a lot of things on world government recently, like the mass slaughter of the whales, the clubbing of baby seals, global warming, rainforest deforestation and that time when you were all in the van and it really smelled like fart but no one would admit that it was them.

"The chart indicated we were a mile and a half" from the coral reef when the ship ran aground, regional Greenpeace official Red Constantino told AFP news agency.
"This accident could have been avoided if the chart was accurate," he said, adding, however, that Greenpeace felt "responsible" for the damage.


You know why you feel responsible? Because you are responsible. That’s why.

The accident happened while the Rainbow Warrior was on a four-month tour of the Asia-Pacific region to promote environmentally-friendly energy sources.
Greenpeace divers were at the Tubbataha park, off the coast of Palawan island, to inspect the effect of global warming on the coral reef.
Mr Constantino said the reef appeared to be healthy.


“That is, until we ran into it and destroyed thousands of innocent marine lives. Well, we’re off to save the whales. Hopefully we won’t run into any, senselessly maiming or killing them with our poor navigational skills and tactless demonstrations against world governments. Anyway, see ya’ around!”

The Rainbow Warrior II escaped serious damage and was towed into deeper water by its own rubber boats.

What a shame.

3 Responses to “news nugget”

  1. # Anonymous gottobegreenanonymous

    Hey! It wasn't GREEN coral, was it?  

  2. # Blogger Alex

    Hilarious. I love your way of reportign these things with the added in comments.
    Personally, I think Greenpeace should stop trying to blame everyone else.  

  3. # Blogger r.fuel

    Thanks.  

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