leapt

Everybody knows that every four years, we have a leap year and we get an extra day in February. The need for an extra day in the calendar every four years is a result of the slightly irregular orbit of the earth around the sun.

Turns out that a day every four years isn’t quite enough. This New Year, we’re getting an extra second.

A couple tips to help you and your family successfully navigate this exciting and potentially dangerous time:
1. Count down from eleven, not ten, this New Year’s Eve. If you don’t account for the extra second, you could kiss that special someone (or drunken stranger) prematurely, before the arrival of 2006. And what kind of way to start the new year is that?
2. Reset your clock before you go to bed. You won’t remember in the morning and you’ll be late to everything.
3. One word: stockpile.
4. Spend the extra time wisely. Sign up for piano lessons. Learn Tai Chi. Squander the opportunity and you’ll regret it forever.
5. Take the first half of that extra second to briefly reflect on all your resolutions for 2006.
6. Take the second half to come to the realization that none of your resolutions will actually come to fulfillment.
7. Write to your congressman and request another extra second that you can use to console yourself for meeting none of your resolutions.
8. Stay hydrated.

2 Responses to “leapt”

  1. # Anonymous anne arkham

    Stay hydrated? I'm laughing so hard!  

  2. # Anonymous benjaminfranklinanonymous

    you got me with: "Spend the extra time wisely. Sign up for piano lessons. Learn Tai Chi."  

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