Thoughts I Had This Morning

1. Yes. Snooze button. Is this what love feels like?
2. This shaving cream smells delicious.
3. Gross.
4. Dang. This steering wheel gets cold at night.
5. I bet I could steer this thing with my knee.
6. Yes. I am the man.
7. Oops. Better switch to hands.
8. He’ll be fine. Cats are resilient.
9. Hmm. The trash fires in Mexico are bad today.
10. Car alarms in the parking garage. Ain’t no sweeter sound.
11. How come no one replies when I say good morning in the elevator?
12. What a douche.
13. Oh. That’s why.
14. Oh, look. Christmas bread. It’s Christmassy, but still bread.
15. For I place I don’t really want to be, I sure drive fast to get here.