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Phil the Caveman

Seventh Cave After the Pile of Stones by the Stream
The Valley Between Urgh Mountain and Cold River


Childhood - Present
Experienced hunter/gatherer. Capable of supporting self and mate through a combination of wooden spear and scrounging techniques. Thirty-two percent success rate in fire-lighting. Confrontational grunting and gesturing skills honed through territorial issues. Experimentation with neighbor extermination for convenience and additional mammoth supply.

Gestation - Childhood
Experienced pooper/suckler. Educated by father, an experienced hunter/gatherer.

Conception - Gestation

Special Skills:

Communications expert
Wooden spear hunting
Ability to consume poisonous plants with few effects
Avoiding sabre-tooths


The mammoth I just killed in the forest.

2 Responses to “resume”

  1. # Anonymous aimee

    if only resume writing could always be that straightforward  

  2. # Anonymous Sirenoremac

    actually, that looks remarkably similar to my resume...  

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