The Tour De France has held my fascination since childhood. I have some very fond memories of watching the Tour on Sundays with my dad. Specifically, I remember laying on the floor, leaning against the couch, cheering Greg LeMond to victory. So it's with great interest that I will track the Tour this year, with the hope that Lance can ride his way to victory yet again. To commemorate the start of the Tour, I give you now a first-day summary from contributing reporter, Dad Fuel (also known as Anonymous in the comment field).

Tour de France
Day 1
Day One is an 11-mile time trial. Lance Armstrong placed second. He was only 2 seconds off the winning time. He passed Jan Ulrich, who started one minute ahead of Lance. That means Lance beat Jan by more than one minute in the space of a 20-minute race. Of course, Jan wore a pink jersey. He always wears a pink jersey. For six years, he has showed up at the Tour de France in a pink jersey. You'd think that by now he would have figured it out: Pink is for Pansies. That's why they both start with P.

*For those of you who have no idea why it is Ulrich's wardrobe being critiqued, Ulrich has been Armstrong's stiffest, most consistent competition at the Tour de France for the past six years. And every year for the last six, he has lost to Armstrong. Pansy.